Say hello to “owOHRJ” - or as she likes to call herself, “Lauren”.
Lauren is part of a very particular digital plague - those wonderful spammers on Twitter who just cant wait to tell you about their “Free laptop, LOL“.
By a strange quirk of fate, I was there moments after her creation and I would be there to witness her somewhat unspectacular demise. Here is the account, roughly ten minutes after it entered our digital world:
Already, Lauren is busy following 149 people, and has picked up a solitary follower. Let’s skip forward to her teenage years - roughly 20 minutes after being created:
My, Lauren has been busy! She’s pulled in a few more followers, but the amount of people she’s going to follow is about to explode as she races headlong into middle age, some 35 minutes after the account went live:
She’s now bumped her followers to 20, and is chasing 812 people around Twitter. No doubt they’ve all been told about her free laptop, LOL. However, a bit of old age seems to be creeping in. We all have to slowdown sometime I guess, which would explain why…
….she’s still in the 800 range with roughly 45 minutes used in the name of spamming. Unfortunately for Lauren, the knees are going, the eyesight isn’t what it was and then…
Click to Enlarge
….the Great Banhammer From the Sky rains down upon her head.
However, with forty odd minutes on the clock and 800+ people now thoroughly sick of the word “laptop” I think our spamming friend has earned a trip to the next life.
With any luck, it’ll be the one with all the brimstone and pitchforks…
Original post by Christopher Boyd and software by Elliott Back